Tally is struggling. She often finds navigating friendships at school difficult and home isn’t very smooth at the moment either. Tally’s best friend Layla ‘gets’ the way Tally feels and the way her mind works but when Layla suddenly moves away, Tally is left floundering.

She’s not alone – at least in the physical sense. Layla’s friends say they’ll look out for Tally and continue to include her in their group, but without Layla’s support, Tally struggles more and more.

Her autism was never a problem when Layla was around, but the other girls are beginning to comment on her differences and complain if she doesn’t like what they are into. They don’t understand that just the bright strip lighting at school, the bright colours, rowdy corridors, school rules and subject demands, all take something from Tally each day. So just the suggestion of a shopping expedition with them fills her with dread.

But she sees other kids on the edges of the school groups. None look happy to be on their own and she really doesn’t want to become one of them. She follows her group into stuff she is uncomfortable with and then regrets her decisions afterwards.

Without Layla at school, and her parents losing their patience with her at home, Tally feels adrift in a roiling sea of friendship dos and dont’s, peer pressures and fitting in.

These pressures build until Tally has no reserves to call upon to even get out of bed some mornings. Her actions weigh heavily upon her and being unable to explain what is happening inside her mind is frustrating, painful and scary to her parents as she shuts down.

Her online friends are worried, Layla hasn’t contacted her and her so-called-friends post something incredibly hurtful online. Help from a surprising source allows Tally to finally realise she can explain how she feels – just not in the way people expect. It has been right at her fingertips the whole time. She just has to be brave enough to do it.

Year 8 is a tumultuous time for any teen, but add the challenges of autism into the mix and each day becomes a battle for main viewpoint character Tally. There are sounds, sights, peer pressures and school demands that constantly pound Tally from all sides. Changes in her friendship dynamics tip things further until her world becomes too hard to navigate.

Not wanting to be alone is normal for anyone, and falling foul to peer pressure is common. Tally falls into this trap, trying valiantly to stay in a group of girls that become more and more toxic, until their cyber bullying goes too far.

There are sections of journal writing, song lyrics and text messaging throughout the book, which help both Tally herself and the reader understand what she is going through.

This is a heart wrenching read, but also a window into a young autistic girl’s world. She is not ashamed of her autism, but like most teens, just wants to fit in. This beautifully written novel shows how she overcomes her bullies, their ‘jokes’ and treatment, and finally sees there are others who are facing their own challenges, willing to stand up for her and themselves. Unfortunately Tally is broken to pieces before she can finally begin building her self back together again.

I haven’t read of the previous novels by these authors, and didn’t need to, to have my heart break for Tally or anyone facing her daily challenges.

Authors – Libby Scott & Rebecca Westcott

Age – 11+

(2023, Scholastic Aust, Autistic, Friendship, Autism, School, Peer Pressure, Anxiety, Family, Coping Mechanisms, Stimming, Journal Entries, Emotions, Overwhelmed, Overstimulated, Year Seven, Horse Riding, Toxic Friendships, Growing Up, Solutions, Understanding, Speaking one’s truth, Speaking up, Neurodiverse,